Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Is it normal?

"I was so depressed yesterday, I thought I'm becoming crazy. Hate everyone, wish I'm gone from everyone's life , and see if they even give a damn. I hate that person for avoiding me, hate that person for not smiling back at me, hate that person for not talking to me, hate that person for looking at me like am some kind of freak who couldnt speak and think at all. hate 'these' people. isolate me and pretend like im not there. hate me but didn't tell me what I did wrong.  let me walk alone, don't even wanna look me in the eyes. Just realize though I'm standing in the crowd, I'm all alone. People just don't give a damn if you're stupid and useless.They'll use you and then forget all about you. I don't want a special treatment, just treat me like everyone else! I feel excluded all the time but honestly, nothing really interest me anymore. Went to school, went to every classes, but could understand nothing and people aren't bother to help either.

"Last night, no one's around. went down to the kitchen twice to find a knife. tried to cut my palm and a little on wrist but our stupid kitchen knife is so blunt, cant even cut through my skin -wtf? lol. I took a small one upstairs and hide it under my pillow just in case. didn't mean to kill myself just hoping to see some blood. it's a proof that I'm living. it's a proof that I can still feel something. Guess there's just so many problems, too little time to solve. I just wish people will stop caring, 'cause when they say they care, they don't mean it forever. And really, please don't care. I'm sick today but I'm going to be alright tomorrow."



Herlisyatt said...

please be alryte

sometime we gonna feel seriously sick with everyone

but trust me

just temporary

Zahidah said...

faiqah,what's wrong?
i really do care for u, though i dont always show it :D

xox Faiqah xox said...

thanks Husna.. biasa la stress ni cuma temporary..=)

mek dah: you better start showing it after this! hihi

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