Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Fooled again.

One day, I was in my house, just walking casually from my bedroom to the kitchen, to have a glass of water. Everything seems so normal, the TV is not opened because no one watch TV anymore, the house is in mess like always, my sisters were doing their own thing~ the sun was shining, everything was so bright and normal.

While drinking the water, I was thinking to myself;  how nice it is to be home again. At that moment, it seems like the life in UK was never happen. or it has been over long time ago. But then, I realized something wasn't right. I don't have any memories of the journey at all. I can't remember how I went to London airport, I can't remember being in the airplane for hours, I can't remember how I went back from KL to Besut, I can't remember if I took the bus, I can't remember dragging the heavy luggage bag around with me. I can't remember anything.

At that point, I realized that everything I'm seeing now is nothing more than just, a dream. I was shocked, couldn't believe my own eyes and my own mind. I stared blankly at everything around me. How could all this be... just a dream? Just a trick my mind is playing on me. I could feel the hard floor on my feet, I could feel everything I touched.

-The rule of dreaming; in the midst of a dream, if you're realized that you're dreaming, you'll wake up- -instantly.-

I knew I was going to wake up anytime at the moment. There's something I want to do before I wake up, I want to meet my mom. So, I ran looking for her. She was outside, getting ready to go somewhere. My mom never stays at home, she always have something to do.

I ran to her and screamed, wait!, I managed to get there on time. I was standing in front of her and hugged her, really tight. I cried real hard and said how much I miss her. I can feel the warm tears on my cheeks and my sadness even though it's a dream. I told her, this is just my dream and I'm gonna wake up anytime soon; and I can feel everything around me is starting to fade away. I didn't remember her saying anything, I just saw her smiling. Then, as I've thought, I opened my eyes and find myself on bed. And everything prove to be just a dream. For a minute, the  room that I've been spending so much time in, feels so unfamiliar, it took me a while to gain my memory back and to believe that I'm now in UK and I still got a long way to go before I can go home.

I hate it when dreams seems so real it fooled me and left me disappointed as soon as I open my eyes. And the rest of the day seems so hard to go through alone.

~xoxo~


2 comments:

selipar biru said...

wuwuuwwuwuwu~~sedih gila..

sempat jgak hugs .
huhu
homesick

xox Faiqah xox said...

Thanks Selipar Jepun..
x sgka selipar pon emosional jugak rupanya..ha3

☼ ☀ ☁ ☂ ☃